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2/28/2018 44 Comments

February 28th, 2018

Chapter Thirteen

Word of the Year: Joy

Not going to lie, today has been pretty crappy. Due to the introduction of some new infusions into Days 1, 2, and 3 of each round, I will now be receiving “the mother lode” of my specific Chemotherapy on Day 1. This includes two new drugs, and an addition of about 3 hours into my normal routine. Due to the delay of my Port placement surgery yesterday, we put off Day 1 of Round 2 until today. Dr. Dreyer had decided that the load probably would have been too much, and we simply didn’t have time to do 6 hours of chemo. I described to my Mom earlier that I felt like I had been hit by a truck. A feeling of utter exhaustion, post pain from my Port placement, and the scary sight of 4 or 5 tubes hooked up to me at a time, all sending fluids into my body. My mom and I will now be in Houston until Friday because of the push back, but if it keeps my body in the best shape possible, I don’t mind at all.

We’ve asked ourselves some questions today. Why now? Why me? Why cancer? It’s especially easy to ask the questions of “why” when you sit in the silence. in the somewhat empty hospital hallway with the occasional nurse passing by, and the constant noise of the infusion machine fixing you. pumping all of these liquids into your body, that a month ago, you never even knew existed. how could a machine that creates such simple small and quiet noises seem to captivate your thoughts and appear as loud as a train horn headed straight towards you? a train  that you heard and saw in the distance but never thought it would make its way to you. these liquids that come in bags of different colors and different sizes that you know will both break down and build up your weak but mighty body all for a chance to ring the bell, say goodbye to machines, and finally....completely realize what God had in mind for your crazy story.

I wanted to share something special that I came to realize a day or two ago. My sweet friend Madalyn Georgens shared with her mom on Monday night, who shared with my mom, that Madalyn had written about me for an english assignment in school. The prompt for the assignment was whether or not we "choose" happiness. Madalyn, you are right. I am sad to be missing out on the end of my senior year, getting to walk from class to class across campus, and simply parking in the school parking lot. I miss seeing friendly faces and smiling at people in the hallway that I didn’t really know, but just thought they might have needed a “pick me up” in that moment. Thank you Madalyn for reminding me of a promise I made to myself at the beginning of 2018, and hadn’t come to realize until now that I had been working so hard to pursue. At the beginning of the semester, I completed an assignment in my English class that required me to decide what my “word of the year” would be. Not wanting to be lame or basic, I got on my phone to look up big and adventurous words that would set the path for how I was going to live my life in the year of 2018. I quickly decided to put my phone down, that I was being silly, and to just go with the word that my heart had chosen in the first place. I had chosen Joy. Madalyn’s words reminded me that though this whole situation is not what I had planned, and is not where I want to be...all I can do is choose joy. Choosing to be joyful in things does not mean that moments of defeat and weakness still don’t appear in our lives. Choosing joy means that we strive to look past the moments of sadness and towards the happiness. Towards those “ring the bell” moments and those moments of feeling successful. So today, Madalyn, and everyone reading, I ask that you choose joy. 

“Having joy is not being happy all the time. Having joy is an underlying sense of knowing that the Lord holds us. Just we because we have moments where we cry, or feel frustrated or say “this sucks” Doesn’t mean we don’t continue to stand firm in our belief that our Joy comes from Him. I’ve got the joy, joy, joy, joy down in my heart.”
-Heidi York (My amazing, strong, and beautiful Mom)

44 Comments
Allee Nix
2/28/2018 04:35:15 pm

Heidi York is my hero

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Denise Ray
3/6/2018 07:39:13 am

What a coincidence! Maddie Ray also wrote about you in her STAAR essay with the same prompt! Writing about you also earned her the maximum score. Keep inspiring others to choose joy in spite of their circumstances for that can make all the difference in the outcome.

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Chloe lester
2/28/2018 04:46:19 pm

fav chapter so far!! I love your sweet and beautiful mom so much!!

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Kathy York
3/1/2018 08:07:26 pm

Love this chapter. Do you know the song The joy of the Lord is my strength ? One of our favorite preachers had a sermon on Joy. He said if the devil can't steal your joy he cant keep your goods. Joy is so important. Perfect word you picked for 2018. The joy of the Lord is my strength.

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Jamie Kraus link
2/28/2018 05:41:07 pm

You’re doing great, Rylie!! Hang in there and thank you for sharing your heart with us! We are not promised an easy road, but we ARE promised a constant companion along the way. Stay strong, sweet girl!

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Kristen Pearson
2/28/2018 06:16:22 pm

True words. I began focusing on true joy last year. It is about finding the joy of the Lord in times of dispair, trials and mountains. He is constant. Never changing. Holding you with every step. You are such an inspiration, Rylie. Praying for you.

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Gretchen Alarcon
2/28/2018 06:21:25 pm

WOW! Just WOW Rylie! You are amazing! I pray for you every time I pray for my own kiddos (which is daily). I hope you feel it!

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Heather Bible
2/28/2018 06:22:19 pm

Rylie - I am amazed by you daily. I have honestly had a fair share of tears since your diagnosis and have had many moments of Why. I love reading your blog and your perspective on life and your faith in God. I hope and pray to have the amount of faith that you have. Thank you for this beautiful chapter today and I promise to look for the JOY!

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Anne Dundas
2/28/2018 06:27:05 pm

Yiu are so strong and so beautiful!!! Your faith and joy are blazing bright!!! We love you and are praying for you every day!!!

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Anne Dundas
2/28/2018 06:31:30 pm

*You

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Cindy Graf
2/28/2018 06:47:02 pm

The "why" days/moments are normal. You are human! Continue to find JOY or that silver lining in everyday. It's just a little harder to find on some days but it's out there and God wants you to find it. I love you word for 2018!

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Carla Catozzi
2/28/2018 07:15:47 pm

JOY. Jesus Others You. Keep spreading the JOY Rylie!!!

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Mimi
2/28/2018 07:25:26 pm

I know those moments of “why” will come into your mind and heart sometimes, but

I also know that because of your amazing walk with Jesus, you will find the joy. You have always been sheer joy for your entire family since the day you came into this world. You are so loved

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Rita
2/28/2018 07:58:26 pm

Thank you for being your wonderful self.

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Michelle Kaley
2/28/2018 07:58:29 pm

Rylie,
Since day 1 of my Cancer diagnosis JOY had been my word too!! The first thing both my surgeon and Oncologist said to me is your attitude will decide how your cancer journey goes. So I immediately knew JOY was my answer. You are so right it doesn’t mean we don’t have hurt, frustrations, and sadness. But I find that the more trust and Faith I have in Gods plan for me the more Joy I feel! One of the greatest blessings of having stage 4 cancer is that it has helped me to know better what is important and what is not. And instead of looking to the future for happiness I am able to find a joy in the journey now! A Roman philosopher (Horace) once said “Whatever hour God has blessed you with, take it with grateful hand, nor postpone your joys from year to year, so that in whatever place you have been, you may say that you have lived happily” Love you Sweet Girl!

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Jenny Jacomides
2/28/2018 08:16:27 pm

Go Heidi! Go Rylie Elizabeth! Much love and prayers for a week with tolerable side effects and no more delays unless they are absolutely necessary. Special love and prayers from my mother Twila Elizabeth and my daughter Bailey Elizabeth (the Elizabeth fan club)!

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Amy
2/28/2018 08:29:06 pm

Thank you for being an inspiration to this mom of 3. 💗 you are so gifted in your writing and i constantly find myself with tears streaming down my face and tonight is no different. What’s most beautiful is your humble manner that seeks to do more for our loving Father through your amazing story. Thank you.

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Amy
2/28/2018 08:32:59 pm

I sing Lauren Daigles’s praise song often blaring in my car and and will be lifting you up also when I praise...

Oh, O'Lord O'Lord I know You hear my cry
Your love is lifting me above all the lies
No matter what I face this I know in time
You'll take all that is wrong and make it right
You'll take all that is wrong and make it right

Whoa...

Your strength is found
At the end of my road
Your grace it reaches to the hurting
Still through the tears and the questioning why
I will stand my ground where hope can be found!
I will stand my ground where hope can be found!

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Shelby
2/28/2018 09:14:43 pm

Love you so much sweet girl! Our thoughts are never far from you and our prayers are without ceasing. You have amazed everyone on this journey as we knew you would with your grace and JOY! Although, we hate this for you and cancer does suck, it has been our JOY to watch your faith set ablaze in this fire and on display for the watching world to see!!! Keep up the fight! We’ve got your back! Xoxo

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Crystal Wilcox
2/28/2018 09:39:18 pm

Rylie, you are one of the bravest, sweetest souls. Prayers for you and your family and know while you may sit in those moments alone you have an army praying and lifting you up. Thank you for sharing your life with us. Love and blessings 💜

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Todd Muirhead
2/28/2018 09:43:46 pm

Great post! Seems like wisdom to me.

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Judy Lester
2/28/2018 10:26:01 pm

You words are beautiful, your heart is beautiful and You are a beautiful reflection of Christ, Your vulnerability with your pain, your determination to fight & your commitment to find joy are extraordinary. Know our family is praying with all the faith and fight we have for your complete return to health! The God of angle armies is always by your side. Keep the fight and faith!!❤️💜

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Jill Beerman
3/1/2018 04:54:34 am

Rylie-I just adopted your word of the year JOY. The girls are following along and we are just so very blessed to know you through your smile, your humor and your faith. We pray for you a lot. And now we will pray that you “ring that bell” earlier than anyone thought possible. Big hugs!

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Hailey Elise
3/1/2018 05:37:32 am

Today, as I was driving early in the morning I was listening to 100.7 The Bobby Bones Show. They randomly started talking about their #pimpinjoy campaign. Amy’s mom chose Joy through her life, I’m so proud to watch such an amazing woman of Christ like you choosing joy as well. I immediately thought of you when I heard it, and I hadn’t even read this chapter until now. God is so good.

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Kevin
3/1/2018 06:30:54 am

Again I say thank you for a reminder that God fills us with His love and we can be joyful though anything that comes. God bless you child and I am continuing to pray without ceasing.

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Lisa Horton
3/1/2018 06:59:25 am

Our family is following your blog and I want you to know how your words have impacted us. It’s so moving to see how the Lord is working through you and the spiritual maturity you have during this tough trial. We pray for you daily and claim your healing in His precious name of Jesus! Hugs from the Horton’s

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Laurie McDonnell
3/1/2018 10:32:33 am

Rylie, you are wise beyond your years. I think this post is one of my favorites. Choose joy! You are showing us all how to live every day. God bless you!

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Darla Thomas
3/1/2018 12:45:29 pm

Rylie, wonderful girl, God bless you sweetie - May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit. Romans 15:13

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Mk
3/1/2018 01:17:28 pm

I have been to Dr Dreyer at texas children’s before!!

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Pop Pop link
3/1/2018 01:37:29 pm

Sweet Rylie, you are the oldest of my grandchildren....January 20, 2000 will always be a special day! All the others look up to you so much.....
your precious testimony does not go unnoticed by Preston, Hudson, Reid, Sophie, Emma, Ruthie and Quay....you are such an example to all of
them. Just let Jesus take the wheel.....I love you so much, your proud Pop Pop.

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Patti McPeek
3/1/2018 01:38:02 pm

Sweet girl, I don’t know you but I know your journey. I sat by my 14-year-old nephew’s side for 17 months during his journey (also at TCH; what amazing people are there!). The “whys” aren’t always evident, but I learned an answer to one of them: when strong, positive, JOYFUL young people walk this road, they touch many lives around them & change minds & hearts without even realizing it. To me that is a Godly purpose that many of us will never fulfill. You are a shining example of this “why” and I will be praying for you & your family each step of the way. Stay strong & joyful 💜

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Ann Chenault
3/1/2018 03:57:16 pm

Your words which reflect God’s promises makes me full of joy!!! Love y’all!!!💜💜💜💜

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Jim & Sharon Silver
3/1/2018 05:14:36 pm

Rylie, When we first started reading your blog, we were struck by what an outward looking person you are. Example: When you first went to Texas Children's Hospital, you commented on all the other children who were there fighting cancer as well. You looked outward trying to bring others joy, ignoring your own plight. This is a beautiful quality in a person - more concern for others than yourself - what Christ taught us. Your Great Grandmother, my Mom, had this quality, your Grandmother, my sister, has this quality, and your mother has this quality. It is the finest characteristic a person can have - and you have it in abundance! But, I'll tell you a little secret - by reaching out to others, unselfishly, as you have done, you actually make your own journey easier because you are focused on others! Keep up the great fight, and let's all continue to pray for other's in Jesus' name. God Bless You Rylie!

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Vern Blatz(Riley’s Mom from swim team)
3/2/2018 06:25:39 am

We are praying for you continuously here! Your words of wisdom and your choice to have joy are so inspiring. So glad you have Jesus and joy.

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Grace Sheidow
3/2/2018 07:15:54 am

You are so strong, motivational and an AMAZING role model! Keep fighting(:

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Wendy Stuewe
3/2/2018 12:08:38 pm

Rylie, we are strangers as I have written before. You are an amazing and courageous young lady! Just keep being you!

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Lauren White
3/2/2018 07:08:05 pm

That Heidi York is a wise woman!

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Tonja
3/3/2018 05:02:56 pm

Wisdom. Love this, and you

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Jen Corona
3/4/2018 02:47:26 pm

So happy you chose JOY!!!! Loved reading this. Hugs. Praying many times daily for you, your brothers, sister, and your amazing strong beautiful Mom!

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Jen Corona
3/4/2018 02:49:27 pm

And your Dad! Whoops

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Deborah Burrkett
3/5/2018 12:59:52 pm

Wonderful chapter! I can see the joy you have in your heart.
You don't know me but I know your grandparents and I knew your great-grandparents. We're actually related (Connie), down the line but I'm claiming you. We have been keeping you in our prayers and keeping up with your blog. Just want you to know that you're an inspiration and I see nothing but good things for you. BTW, you're rockin the shaved head! Keep sharing the JOY!

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Jill Prescott
3/6/2018 06:29:34 pm

Rylie, I don't really know you other than to have seen you come and go from the Cohen's across the street, but I want to say, I find your faith in these blog posts challenging mine to grow bigger and bigger and bigger. I am listening to a podcast series called "Believing is Seeing" based on the teaching that Jesus really called people to step out in faith to be able to then see him move in supernatural ways. You are living this kind of faith. I am so thankful you are not keeping what you are learning to yourself. I truly believe God made you for such a time as this. May God continue to work in you and through you. Looking forward to seeing how he moves mountains for you. Praying faithfully for healing.

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Debbie Duhrkopf
3/12/2018 08:27:42 am

You have been a part of my prayers every day since I saw your grandmother’s post on fb. Your precious Mom and my daughter worked together in Waco. You are such an inspiration to so many people and I’m in awe of your strength, your positive attitude, your faith. Joy is one of my favorite words. It’s a reminder to me of where my focus should be:
J-Jesus
O-others
Y-yourself

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